It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Randomize
