I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Randomize