hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
I'm like, not good at living.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
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