I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Randomize
