So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
