ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Randomize
