I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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