I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
the liver wants what the liver wants
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Randomize
