I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Randomize
