i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
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