i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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