Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
