Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
As shirtless as possible
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
The power of my boobs compel you
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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