Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
dude i'm inner monologue high
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
