When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
