Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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