kristin has been a bad kristin
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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