those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Randomize
