p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize
