I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
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