talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Randomize
