she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
