i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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