I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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