I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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