Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
Randomize
