last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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