hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
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