So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Randomize
