atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
