Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
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