operation harelip BJ is a go
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
