All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
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