I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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