After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
