okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I deserve this hangover.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
