I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
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