I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
