Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize
