I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize