She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
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