Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
