I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
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