im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
I think I have vodka in my lungs
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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