we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize