And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Randomize
