Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
it's like heaven, but drunker
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
