Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
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