The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Randomize
