Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
